Sunday, June 23, 2013

Good-bye Crazy Year. Onward & Upward!

So, it's now been a year since I got sick.  This anniversary has really made me think about everything, and count my blessings.  I know it's kind of weird, but I'm grateful for this trial and what I've learned from it.  Here's a list of some of the things I've learned:

1.  You can live as healthy as possible, eating all the "right foods", cutting out all things that are bad, and still get sick.  Really sick.  Nothing is guaranteed.  And?  I need to chill about the eating.  Balance is good.

2.  I've learned to think more seriously about the statistics that are thrown around.  For example, when they say only 1% experience this or that side effect, you think it will never happen to you.  Well, I was one of the .0001 % who get Guillaine-Barre Syndrome (GBS).  The small percent is real.

3.  I've learned to have more sympathy for others who have any sort of illness.  I hear their stories and I feel more sympathy & compassion than I would have before.  I think this is part of the Lord's plan as we go through trials-  to experience something and become more empathetic.

4.  I've learned that doctors don't know everything, and sometimes you need to go with your instincts.  If I hadn't gotten treatment when I did, I could have gotten to the point of paralysis and recovery could have been so much worse.

5.  I've learned that my love for researching things on the computer can really come in handy (it's how I figured out my symptoms of numb hands, feet, and lips were probably GBS).

6.  I've learned that the psychological healing can take longer than the physical healing.  Until recently I haven't been able to go back to super healthy eating.  The thought of it would give me major anxiety.  Last week, though, for some reason I was able to wrap my head around going sugar-free again, and I've been fine with it.  In fact, it's been kind of easy.  It doesn't take any extra work to take something away, so I figure it's a great start.  I've lost a couple of pounds... we'll see if it's lasting or temporary.

7.  I've learned that going back to eating sugar & gluten can make you gain the weight back... and fast.  I gained back the 25 I lost plus 5 more.  Frustrating, but humbling.  I'm hopeful that sugar-free eating will help me get back to a healthier weight.

8.  I've learned more appreciation for really good friends, who have stuck with me through my recovery.  They really helped me out, especially as I was going through the worst of it last year.  This past weekend we were able to run the Wasatch Back Ragnar Relay together as a team, and it was a lot of fun.  Love these girls!

9.  I've learned that some people in the "whole foods" world are extreme, and are living in denial.  I feel they can be as bad as those "evil"  people they preach against.  That's been part of the psychological struggle for me- knowing who to trust.   And getting over the hurt for feeling betrayed.

10.  I've learned that I can be strong and healthy, even when I'm 30 pounds heavier than I want to be.  In the  relay I did 3 legs:  4.8 miles, 7.7 miles, and 4 miles straight up a mountainside.  I felt great!  I could only speed walk the hill, but I still went pretty fast.  The reason I'm putting this one is that I'm learning to love my body at any shape, not just at the ideal weight.  I still want to lose weight again, mind you, but I'm learning to accept myself more.

I plan to start writing in my blog more, and document the trip back.

1 comment:

  1. After the experiences that you and Kristen have gone through, I keep thinking, "everything in moderation." Even at that, I need to work on it. :) I enjoy reading your posts, and I hope you keep writing.